To all those who may wish to insult me!
By Mylène Grégoire, President and PCC coach at Mymosa &CO Consulting inc.
A true story
I am in the Air Canada lounge. We’ve just got back from a delightful weekend with friends. The lounge is bustling, filled with travelers hurriedly grabbing food and searching for a place to unwind. In a moment of goodwill, my spouse and I offer our spot to a couple in need.
As I take a brief pause in the restroom, preparing for a movie marathon on our flight to Vancouver, an unexpected incident transpires. A man, sharply dressed in a stylish blue suit, seemingly from the Harry Rosen store, erupts with anger, blaming us for delaying everyone. According to him, our five-minute bathroom break caused his inconvenience. My spouse, maintaining composure, explains that our spot had already been taken by another couple. Before I can respond, the elevator doors close, leaving us bewildered.
I must confess, I am not accustomed to receiving insults, and for a brief moment, his toxic words had an impact. Caught off guard, I couldn't muster a witty comeback. Subsequently, various retort scenarios played out in my mind. Here are a few options:
Option 1: Align with his anger, suggesting, "The wine and cognac are nearby; they might help calm you down." Or go further, stating that people like him contribute to toxic environments and wars. While momentarily satisfying, it could escalate his anger, making it an unfavorable choice.
Option 2: Apologize and attempt to calm him down, even if illogical. However, I find excuses uncomfortable, as it implies admitting to a mistake, I don't believe I made. Besides, in my practice, I promote confidence and conviction in facing difficult situations, making this option untenable.
Option 3: Embrace empathy, overlooking his inflated ego, and considering his potential struggles. Wondering about his story and what led to his unpleasant demeanor, I contemplate responding with unconditional love. This involves increasing my mental strength, offering a hug, and reassuring him that things will pass. Although risky, it aligns with compassion and may decrease the likelihood of recurrence.
I opt for the third choice. When faced with an insult, I propose stepping back, unfolding the whole story, and considering the consequences of your words and actions. What is the cost to you and others? Is there a more peaceful alternative? Choosing compassion, rising above anger, and viewing situations with a human perspective can contribute to a better world.
So, be warned: the next time you insult me, I might avoid entering your storm, refrain from judging you, and, circumstances permitting, offer you a hug!
Mylène Grégoire, president and coach at Mymosa &CO, author, speaker and founder of the online training programs Brillez au boulot and From Gut to Success.
mymosa.co
